"You're not a nice person, but I like you anyway." - B to A

"It's just exploding. Wait 'til it's done, it'll be fine" -B

"Tell him I overpowered you. It will be true in a minute." -B

"Don't mess with me, I've got wine!" - Charles

"How are you? I only died. You look worse." - Spire

"For your courtesy, thank you." - Beatrix
*shrug* "Keep on keeping Anani out of trouble." -Spire
"I haven't been that successful."
"No one is..."

"Discretion is our watchword.
Daring Rescues our specialty!" - Jim & Beatrix

I think this is where Beatrix's "Divination" schtick turns to "Blast" - Sarah

I'm loading my rifle for "'thopter" - Jim

Leave no weapon behind.

She's being co-pirate - Beatrix
You can be pilot, and I'll be co-pilot. I'm pirate and you can be co-pirate. - Alaric (to Jim)
Deal. -Jim

He may be invulnerable but the laws of physics are immutable. - Beatrix
<pause>
This from the magician? -GM

Oh shit, if I cast Banish, Diego will...
Well, Diego will just have to deal. - Beatrix

When the Ninja-Pirate is swearing, it's probably not a good sign.

In a brawl with bad guys/mooks:
"I thought we needed one alive!" - Jim
"That would be yours!" - Beatrix

Beatrix vaporizes mook. Elder monk looks disturbed/upset.
"Luma yelled at me earlier for swearing." - Alaric, conversationally
"Picky, aren't they?" - Beatrix

*sigh* "I needed one alive." - Beatrix, after freezing a mook
"He could thaw... - Jim
*sigh* We don't have time. - Beatrix

Five shackles? There's Isobel and Liz... Bryan... Alec...
<pause>
And me. Fuck. - Diego discovers why he's "very useful" to the Evil Plan

[Diego,] You don't do drag. - GM
(Diego in a pink dress...
... he's flaming! - Kisha/Sarah/Charles OOC

GM, dramatically:
A ball of flame goes toward Raskin!
He puts up a wall of water! It still knocks him back!
He looks...
... Steamed? - Diego

Bad Ninja! No brownie!

Just--Hazel, the metal detector stays off in the bedroom. - Kathy

We should wait at the mouth of the cave. We'd look delectable there. - Hazel

This is unnatural. - Hazel
Duh. - Kathy

(escaping from 2nd floor of building):
I'm gonna drop. I don't give a fuck. - Kathy
About who? - Adam
You guys. - Kathy

There are only so many whack-jobs in Chicago! - Adam

Pfft. California. Everyone's in a cult in California. - Kathy

I was... getting a cup of coffee and I got shot. - Didier

Next time we need to pick allies, can we get a better draft number? - Adam
You mean like the werewolf? - Ray

You can never be too clean for the Occult! - Hazel

Experimental summoning is NOT a valid research activity!! - Adam

Grade A sacrifice! Right here! - Adam about Didier

Even secret agents need friends... - Hazel to Kathy

It's a sketchy neighborhood... -Hazel
You know judo. - Kathy
Good point.
You survived a monster.
You're right! I can handle thugs!

Wanna get some dinner afterwards? - Adam
Wanna do something illegal after dinner? - Hazel
*pause* Maaayyyyybe....? - Adam

She gets annoyed if we call her too much. It's that communication thing... she's been working with the NSA too long. - Adam (about Kathy)

Must. Kill. Everyone I know. - Kathy

*gasp* Do you have the hots for Chiasson?! - Hazel
No! Er. Not necessarily...- Didier

If we go, I want you to leave this attitutde behind here in Chicago. - Kathy to Didier
Not here! This is my apartment! - Adam

YOU meditate?!?! - Adam, Didier, Ray to Kathy

You look like you've seen a ghost! - Kathy
What do you think a poltergeist is?! - Hazel

Horrible ghostbusters, going after young 10-year-old ghosts...

He has an amazing voice, considering he has no head. - Hazel

Maybe we should call Kathy on her cellphone? - Hazel
Why? - Didier (crit fail on mind check)

We're talking about the world, Hazel!! - Kathy

My life cannot get any weirder. ... Did I just say that? - Adam

The Tooth Fairy's real and is fucking with my mind! - Adam

We're looking for a bloated woman? Right? - Ray
That would be middle America? - Adam

If they're cultists, they must have candles! - Hazel

Didier, what is the nature of your emergency? -Ray

I'm glad nothing happened to us, then. - Didier

You can't help [Kathy] by getting taken by a different monster. You have to be taken by the same monster and we don't know how they're related. - Adam.

So... what's the plan? -Ray (after lenghty discussion)

We don't know if defoliant will work fast enough so we need a backup -- a machine gun. - Hazel

The plan was to run away, and we did! It was a perfectly executed plan!

We need to figure out what to do with our little box of evil. - Adam

Hazel! What did we say about experimental summoning?! - Adam

Adam! I can't believe you left the flashlight on! See! On! No light! Off! No light! On! No light! Off! No light! Oh! You can't even see because there's no light!!! - Hazel

"I've got a troupe of gnomes!" - Jorr

"For Goodness' sake, don't shake the bottle!"

"The first guys we see - we club em'" - Brom

"You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I agree with Brom" - Jorr before the episode in the clearing.

"Ah-Choo!!! Ah-Choo! Ah-Choo! Ah-Choo!!!" - Brom

"He's right! Shoulda thought of it myself! Brilliant boy!" - Sved about Brom

"No! Bad barbarian!!" - Sved shakes his finger at Brom for gagging a druid with (the druid's) shoe

"Let's go. I have a bad feeling." - Brom
"That's probably the quiche - Jorr

"All right! No beating on the barbarian! Verbal abuse is enough!" - Jorr

"I say it's 'food o'clock'!"

"You... want to grease your horse..." - Jorr
"I've got an idea..." - Alexander

"Hooked on Bromics"

"I'm not payin." - Brom
"Brom..." -Jorr
"I don't have the money." - Brom
"He listened to you, Brom." - Jorr

Brom is a method actor

"We're not superstitious. We're sailors!!"

"I'm speechless. That's a rarity." - Sam

"My rabbit has special needs." - Reg

"I go to a miner bar" - Pysmo
"You find a bar full of small children" - GM

"Are you allergic to hay?" - Turm
"No, if you noticed this morning..." - Casslan (who spent the night in the stable)
"Well I am, so we'd better hurry."

No one is going to mess with a drunk barbarian with a flowerpot on his head and a bunny in his lap - That's how nature says "Do Not Touch". - Charles

"You can always improve the watch (at night) by tormenting your employer."

"I'm told..the purple flower ... is an aphrodesiac" - man hitting on Casslan
"You're not supposed to tell her that before giving it to her" - Kerani whispers
<pause>
"D'oh!"

"Oh sure! Keep the stuff I gave you..." - guy hitting on Casslan, at a loss for words
"Oh thanks! I should sleep well tonight..." Casslan, still oblivious on what it is
"..."

"Wow, I've never seen someone's psyche hit so hard... there was shrapnel" - Robert

"I've got the head!" - Kisha, as she picks up the phone, which was ringing

"Um... we're dealing with some guy who wants a head" - Colin, talking to someone on his cell phone

"I like the kind of "Azathoth goes Industrial" path this is taking." -Ry

"It makes Fnord's balloons go." is the best answer to any "why?" question I've ever heard. - Chris

When the noble of Glass tells a lie, does he turn transparent? "You're lying! I can see right through you!" - Lanse

I sense impending smiting. - Jascha

So we need a sexy War/Death, and a Nothing that bears a remarkable resemblance to Trent Reznor. Then we could be like God's Own Rock Band. It'd be great. We'll have Law on drums, and give Chance like a tambourine or something similarly harmless. Purity can be a backup singer. - Jascha

OK, I'm not really trying to turn us into a family of Bible thumping goths. I swear. - Brad

"Azrael builds toy trains ... to scale." - GM

"Hooker with a heart of gold. That's what Purity said!" - CJ
"Oh, so you're going to take her word for it just because she's you're sister." - (CJ's anchor)

"I'm just a message! You don't shoot the message!"

"Here goes nothing!" - CJ
"No, actually, there goes Chance." - GM

"A Hasid, a ghost, and a scalpel are sitting around a table..."
"... with Neil Gaiman." - our anchors get together

"Shall I tell the story of your enlightenment, O Siddhartha?" - peasant
"Yes. Do. I should be very ... enlightened..." - Sanctitas

"What if I just go into his tent and shoot myself?! It'll be the right time!" - Sanctitas

"Save my Tamagochi..." - Nothing whimpers as his pet's life is threatened by lack of batteries

"Even Rage hasn't gotten in an argument with an inanimate object!!" - Nothing

"You did not cross into China because you were drunk??" - Raj the demon (to Sanctitas, who he thinks is Siddhartha)

"I search for angry, Viking women in New Hampshire." - Rage

"Fire pretty..."

"Oh! Gunner is playing the bladder."

"Why do the stupid people always live?"

"Incindentally, where did you get the flaming sword?" - John Dee
"Oh, I found it somewhere" - Sanctitas (appearing as Queen Elizabeth)

"So...what Excrucian ate my family?"

"I look graceful and berserk." - Rage

"I do whatever Rite Blade is gonna do before he does it!" - Brad?

"As Rage attacks the body Politic..."

"Saving Rage's life through insults!"

"I take the weapons, my rock, and two years worth of speed." - Nothing

"Take a miracle point. But add the flaw, 'no head'."

"We need to return Zack." - C.J.
"Oh right, to get our money back. Hey, there was that Noble of Quage..." - Blade
"Think he'd like Nothing?"
"It's what he's got now..."

"Chaos says that Insanity thinks that Hazazel says..." - Sarah

"We'll work on the black holes-cheese-France-snails angle." - Rage

"Curiously, the Nothing is incompatible with the Something." - GM explains to Zack that he can't run an internet connection outside the Weirding wall without using a miracle

"DO....YOU....SPEAK....ANGEL?!?" - Blade to the Noble of France

"I hold out the big glowing flaming sword, in a non-threatening manner." - Rage

"I mean, I am all powerful and in enemy territory ... doesn't seem like a good time to leave [there]." - Zack

"She looks good for a demon with no face." - GM to Zack

"Wanna play Doom?" - Kyra, aforementioned demon
"...yeah?" - Zack in a conflicted voice
"And if I win we can have intercourse!"
"...sounds....fair...." - Zack in a small voice

"So, Mr. Black Hole, Nothing can free things from a black hole?" - Zack
"Nothing but Hawking Radiation, sir."
"Doh! They always have an out."

"I'm so confused." - Confusion

"I wonder if that was part of the Plan?" - Blade, when Neil chops off Didi's head

"My Lord!!" - Rage
"Yes?" - Azrael
"Um... My Lord, shit is going down!"

A wave of relief washes over Didi.

"I'm not sure it was worth it this time."

"Was it interesting?"

A pause.

"Yes, it was very interesting! I ate a Snickers, which was very good, and I was enNobled! That's never happened before."

"The witches are a wily bunch." - Ozy tries the locked door

"You're on fire." - GM
"Do I notice?" - Jascha (playing Mike the doctor)
"Yes, in your calm appraisal of the room, you notice you are on fire."

"Wow... violence and softcore porn..." - Pete
Note: isn't this all our games at one point or another...??

"Poor guy, in a coma and the charges have been dropped." - MD
"Whaa...?" - Mike awakens

"How come you keep playing DUMB alcoholics with high mind?" - Brad to Pete

"Maternal instincts going off... what do I have to fight this??" - Desiree

"What the hell does a middle aged man want with a boy band anyway?" - Ozy

"And what does this film teach us, kids?"
"DRUGS are GOOD!"

"And I'm stuck...alone...with a dead whiny goth." - Mike

"And so we see the dangerous slippery slope to Kisha's character"

"I'm medicating my demons." - Mike

"Thank you for filling this donut with warm gushy stuff, just like you fill my soul..." - Ozy mocks Desiree

"We're corrupting the evil!"

"What's your 'mind'?" - Brad
"Highly specialized..." - Pete (as Jeremiah)

"Well... we got the big stuff ... an' the explosive stuff" - Jeremiah, looking at his list of equipment to check on.

"Somebody done stole our sardines!!" - Jeremiah
"Well, DAMN!! Who'd want all them sardines??" - another Shaftoe brother
"That's what happens when ya don't have LYNCHIN' in this town -- sardine rustlin'!" - Jeremiah

"Should we not look for clues?" - Rachel

"You were attacked by a polar bear in Germany??" - Rachel
"Things got ... ugly ... in Germany" - Shaftoe

"He has an 88 in 'bluster'" - GM about Starkweather

"It all begins to come together like a skillful seven person orgy..." - Rachel

"I glow when endangered." - Rachel

"How are your new accommodations?" -Moore to Kelley (in the brig)
"Quite...um...satisfactory" -Kelley
"... I want you to look over these cargo manifests" -Amy parodying Moore

"He could be blacklisted on the dog handler..." -Rachel begins indignantly
(pause) "....newsgroup?"

"Wallace, can you stalk?" - Rachel

"'Let us pray contrive' ... Who talks like that??" - Shaftoe
"I just have better writers." - Rachel

"Today... we're teaching malamutes to fly!"

"You want something blunt? Here. Use Betsy." - Rachel

"Starkweather dances like a dream. (pause) Moore dances like a bad dream." - GM

"I yell a Norse battlecry!" (Jascha playing one of the dog handlers)

"Ha Ha! Such things don't affect Australians! ....AAAAAaaaugggh!!!" - Wallace

"Never grapple with a Norwegian dwarf when DEATH is on the line!!" - Everyone

"I wonder if you could pick up a gross of profilactics..." - Rachel
"So you gonna like... make a signup sheet?" - Giles (NPC)

"Yes. It was hot. It's a flamethrower." - Gilmore

"There will be NO Cthulhu this trip." - GM
(Headline: Cthulhu in SE Asia)

"Colt! Wallace! Men who perform dangerously stupid acts are sexy!!" - Rachel
"...And she has black underwear!!" - Betsy
"You're incorrigible" - Rachel whispers to Betsy

"Black as the blackest night - black... as Satan's Heart..." - Sailor about Rachel's panties

"Nothing excites me like whaleflesh." - Rachel

"We don't hafta...kiss... not that I'd mind..." - Giles

"I'm not being subtle are I?" - Giles
(pause) "Y'know Giles, there's a slot on my signup sheet that's looking empty..." - Rachel

"What, you're straight in this game?" - Jon to Ry

"Yay Betsy! We love Betsy..." - Everyone about Betsy's cooking
"AAHNK!" - penguin

"Good little debutantes go to Africa" - Acacia Lexington

"God had nothing left when he made this!!" - about antarctica

"Aw man, it's just the women folk runnin' after her. That ain't good." - Shaftoe

"You're far too cautious" - Moore
"You'd be cautious too if a little lady just clocked you one" - Wallace

"Where's Lake Milford?" - Driscoll
"Can't you hear the hyphen, man??" - Rachel

"You've got a black eye" - Shaftoe
"I most certainly do NOT." - Winchester

"As an author? Dearie, I can barely be ghostwritten." - Rachel

"A sense of humor so dark, it's infrared..." (no idea)

"What is that?" - Black Jack
"It's...uh... ionized sea water." - Shaftoe explains the greenish sky

"They're individually wrapped..." (re: the bodies)
"For freshness!"

"You're in the antarctic. Thousands of miles away from any civilization. The sun hasn't set for three weeks, the sky is green and you're asking me what?" - Packard thinks about body bits

"Where's the beef?" - Rachel

"Make a contested dissection roll..."

"We need to search for a missing man. Come on NOW!" - Rachel
"Well how many of you are there??" - Betsy

"I was hoping to do my mastoral thesis on the humpbacked pumpkin" - Shaftoe

"Do you have any first aid or medicine?" - GM
"No." "Good."

"I nudge [the radio] with my foot."
"It moves slightly."
"Does it move in an... EVIL way?"
"It doesn't slither..." - Shaftoe checks out the radio

"What're you making for dinner?"
"I think someone mentioned pemmican fondue..."

"You know what this MEANS??? TENURE!!!"

"It must have just been a weird tissue reaction. We'll see if it happens again." - Betsy describes the frozen pentaform moving

"Did yah bring a generatah with yah?" "Nope." "Then we got problems."

"He needs about a team of mothers." - Betsy about Cole

"[She's known as the] Woman Who The Giraffes Love." "Bwaaaaaa." - about Acacia Lexington

"We have a woman who respects the dogs. She is a floozy. But she respects the dogs." - Olaf about Rachel

"We also brought some self-taught Australians..."

"No fungus 'ere!"

"Remember - high physics doesn't matter with low intelligence."

"Not that radio. The sound didn't come from that."
"Yea, it was ripped out and rewired and not connected. I saw it with my own eyes."
- Shaftoe explaing the evil radio to the Germans

"Now, the questions you're wondering is.... did I have 5 bullets in the gun... or six" - Rachel (the actress, flaw: thinks life is a movie)
"Uh-huh. I don't think the shoggoths will be interested in dialogue." - Wallace, doubting the usefulness of the distraction

"A wet shoggoth... is a safe shoggoth"

"Only TWELVE of us are doomed now!" - Rachel

"Uh. Sorry. I thought I uh..."
"recognized somebody!" (Brad interrupts)
"...saw my house" - Shaftoe upon looking at the murals in the Elder City

"Well, we got a big squid head here. Should it go in the den? Prolly not a bedroom item." - Shaftoe (looting the murals)

"Maybe it's one o' them laamers" - Shaftoe

"Well you know, you sort of disappeared so I had to land [the plane]" - to Driscoll

"Did you bring the grue bait?" - Brad
"You're here." - Jascha

"PICASSO! This looks like a Picasso! Almost exactly like the one in my bedroom!" - Rachel comments on the Elder murals

"It's just the city settling." - Wallace about the strange noises we hear

"Shaftoe, could I ask you not to chip off any more murals without consulting one of the scientific staff?" - Rachel
"There are plenty of murals to go around!!" - Shaftoe sulks

"Shall we go see the evil building?"
"You don't know it's evil."
"Ok. Cyclopean building of dangerous neutrality then." - Rachel and Shaftoe

"Since we're sharing the hallucination, it must have actually happened." - Rachel. Shaftoe grunts and starts checking out the wall. "Oh, don't bother investigating, we won't find a thing." (Shaftoe rolls his eyes and continues, doesn't find anything) "Are you done?" Rachel asks impatiently. "Yes, Miss VanBuren." "I told you."

"How did you kill all them [giant] ants?" - Shaftoe asks Rachel about a movie she was in
"We didn't. Microbes you know." - Rachel
"Ah. Did we bring any of that stuff with us?"

"Driscoll, you owe your pecker to us." - Rachel

"We apologize for the incident three years ago. We hope there will be no hostilities between us. Signed, The Humans"

"I did explicitly bring porn..." - Shaftoe

"I'm gonna go out on a limb an' say this place is NOT FRICKING RIGHT!!" - Shaftoe to Starkweather

"So... you step over innummerable archaelogical finds in order to get to the BIG SHINEY THING?" - GM

"I see no reason to respect the sanctity of an unholy place like this! The Christ is with me!" - Miles loots another mural

"[His underwear] has gone where no underwear has gone before"

"We're a little far up so I don't know if we'd see the underwear and the note." - Rachel to Cathy

"'Loot and pillage' is just an Australian euphanism..." - Wallace

"I didn't know you were going to blow a hole in it!" -Rachel
"At least we're not running with scissors." - Shaftoe

"It's always <whine, whine, whine> you can't blow that up." - Shaftoe about the scientists

"Did you dynamite it?!?" - Cathy
"Starkweather did it!" - Shaftoe at the same time as
"Just a little...." - Wallace

"It's magnificent isn't it?!" - Starkweather
"Sure, as magnificent as any half ton of glass can be." - Shaftoe

"You SURE you dno't wanna see what's in that cavern?" - Shaftoe convinces Starkweather to spelunk down a frozen waterfall

"I think that one's eating a pudding."
"Nonono. The pudding is eating IT."
<pause> "Oh. Oh right... Ewww!" - Wallace and someone discuss a mural (showing the Elder things and their attackers)

And lastly: (OOC after game)
"He's got a bloody shape-changing spell! Danforth! That's why none of the people looked like the last expedition!!!" (Everyone stares dumbfounded at Rachel)
"Rachel's gone bye-bye..." - Driscoll to the others
"Or I could be wrong." - Rachel, offhandedly

"Halpern runs out with his head flailing" - Jon misspeaks

"Hoo-damn boy, that sure explains some stuff!" - Shaftoe upon seeing the real Rachel

"C'mon boy, it'll be ok, there's just two of her..." - Shaftoe ineffectually comforts Wallace

"Dear God! They shot my stunt double!" - Rachel

"Flying toward you..." - Jon
    "Excuse me?" - Driscoll
"Above the buildings..." - Jon
    "Oh fuck." - Driscoll

"Rational is sensible! STOP HIM NOW!" - Rachel

"All three wounds [were] to the head." - Jon about Wallace
"Which is fortunate, because he's Australian

"Who DOES his special effects?" - Rachel about Danforth

"So when do you call 'Cut'?" - Betsy?
"If he starts saying a spell again!" - Rachel

"She was a damn good actress, Mr. Moore." - about Danforth/Williams/Rachel

"...as Driscoll commits suicide in the most Byzantine way possible."

"Take a gift point for dying." - Jon to Jascha

"How do you know what a unicorn looks like?" - Rachel to Cathy
"Yeah, she is kind of frumpy." - Wallace

"Aww, he prolly speaks Morse-German or somethin' like that." - Shaftoe about Germans in the Belle.

"God, the pentaforms aren't scientists, they're computer scientists!" - Amy

"Hopewell screams like a little girl" - Jon (when Hopewell sees globby thing grabbing Wallace)

"Due to a poor translation, you are known as the one who got eaten by a jelly donut."

"So this is, like, you fifth head wound of the game, if you count the Shoggoth." - Rachel
"That wasn't blood trauma." - Wallace

"Catherine, yelling a geologic battlecry..."

"They're wussy! Just like us!" - (Rachel? Wallace?)

"She's not human anymore and Betsy doesn't know it." - Amy

"Man, I'd go out for a beer with that pentaform"

"This is ludicrous Rachel." - Betsy
"What hasn't been ludicrous today?" - Shaftoe

"I told you to get the ski!"
"Right. I go get the ski. The ski doesn't have any tentacles." - Miles

"Game called on account of donut."

"Word. They're Australian for beer." - Jon

"And here I thought I was in the sleeping bag of sanity." - Hopewell

"Woulda been a good Plan A."

"No wonder there was a stunt double! This one's dangerous!" - Rachel

"I'm not supposed to be a mechanic today." - Meier

"I zinc zere's some ice in ze... flappy thingy ... how you say... elevator?" - Meier

"If there's two gunshots, sombebody's probably dead, so there's no problems there." - Hopewell

"Acacia knocks him over the head, grabs his hair, grabs her club, and drags him back to the plane." - Amy

"Betsy can sound sincere. It's a speech impediment." - Rachel

"All right YOU ALL left me with the crazy chick!" - Betsy
"Well WE got the hand of doom in the plane" - Hopewell

"If [the radio] shows any sign of being shifty" - Miles
"You mean like slithering?" - Jon

"I think I'm losing my mind." - Miles

"Fixing the radio... swatting it when it slithers..." - Miles

"Which dead character am I now?" - Jascha

"The Doctor?"
"Yes. Doctor Schtick."

"An' you are now French" - Amy to Brad

"WILL YOU STOP IT WITH THE SEVERED HEAD ALREADY!!" - Betsy

"Are you bringing that thing with you??" - Hopewell

"Lying ... acting .. it's all the same ..." - Rachel
"Thanks, Rachel!" - Betsy?

"Who is this?" - B shows Meier Starkweather's head
"Is ... um ... Starkweather." - Meier
"What happened?" - B
"He was ... decapitated. Is long story."

"Zey found wall of heads. It was troumatic; they had difficulty explaining. I imagine it was ... big wall of heads." - Meier

"Now is time on sprockets when we KILL!" - Meier upon seeing Falker

"So is it easier to head for a cache at the South Pole, marked with flags but otherwise on a featureless plain, or a continent..." - Miles

"Well if he wouldn't have arrested me, I would have helped him." - Hopewell

"He had a wall fall on him, and we sick Betsy on him?"

"If it does not melt into jelly, it is probably safe." - Meier

"Why are all my lovers doomed?" - Betsy
"They're not doomed, they're just ill-fated." - Rachel

"Look, if every man Betsy loves dies, she'll have a fit." - Rachel

"Shoglings?!" - DeWitt

"Someone stole the women!" - DeWitt

"Hey pretty lady! Oh. It's you, Betsy."

"We should reimburse you. Would you take a company check?" - British secret service agent Theodora to Emanuelle

"I hate when you give me the 'GM look'" - Amy to Ry

"Look. Here's your girlfriend." Angel points to herself "Here's a lighter." Angel waves lighter in front of one ear while showing Iaziz the other "See?!?! See?!?!?! I DON'T KNOW!!!"

"No. I don't have any 'cute' traits."

"You fuckin' kidding me?? You're gonna fuck a GOD??"

"I don't actually smoke... but I suppose it might be nice" - after being offered a cigarette (and taking one)

"I don't think it means what I think it means."
"You don't KNOW what it means!"

"There is also an 'upperclass twit of the year' award."
"PERCY!" [could win that one] - Aurelia

"So you're sayin' the world tree is an orgasm?" -Izzy
"It's as good as your theory." -Poreus
"Fair... mine's less sticky." -Izzy

"That Evil Dragon Fuck is our lord and master." -Angel to our new brother Liam

"Like if it were bumping around in my jacket will I accidentally conference call a bunch of GODS?" - Liam gets his Family cell phone

"He's wee but he's MIGHTY!" -Brad, about Liam the leprechaun

"My name is Abdul [long incomprehensible Arabic name]. But you can call me 'Skip'." -Cab driver

"Nobles check in, but they don't check out..."

"Aww... That's just a DAY job!" -Sulfur
"DAY JOB?? Working for the AntiChrist!!" -Liam learsn some of his family serves Hell

"You might call Poreus deep, but that would imply something at the bottom."

"Reagan. Those were mythical, we'll take 'em." -Tir Na Nog bartender, in reference to the dollar bills used to pay.

"The Temple now seems to be a gazebo." - after the third Word of Power used in the game...

"Wakadja and Poreus head toward the Donut of Doom" - after the chancel "gave birth"

"You can't sell tickets to redemption!!!" -Angel to Percy

"Suspicious? Of someone who summoned me with a spice and is SUCKING THROUGH MY BRAIN??" - Aurelia to Hasp "But this is Heaven - War, Death and Pestilence are OK as long as there's no naughty words!" - Aurelia

"The angel Michael is up in Heaven. There are many things he is reputed to be.... being a PUSSY is NOT one of them."

"I like Pestilence & Death!" (player comment)

"Fuck Famine!" (response: "I'd rather not...")

"She apparently has the machine that goes KWEEP!"

"You're a fun toy, Poreus" - Minna, noble of lost things "Look, it's lateral thinking, ok??" - Angel
"Is 'lateral' another word for 'moron'?"

Quotes aside, as I got home from that session, the song that was playing on the radio as I turned into the lot was... somehow appropriate. "It's the end of the world as we know it..."

"Excrucians don't live over the Wyrding Wall."
"Who does?"
"Go look for yourself."
[pause] [The Emperor gets a gleam in his eye]
"Real estate!!"
-Poreus and the Emperor

"Abhorrent weapons just want to be free, Aurelia" - Minna

"Is m'lord busy tonight?"
"'M'lord' may not exist."
"Well then, m'lord will presumaly not be busy..."
- Diva to Percy

"Sure, sure. Nail me to the yo-yo of Fate." - Herman

"You know it's only 'cuz you treat me so good that I let you treat me so bad. That, and you control my body." - Herman

"OH MY GOD!! THE AUTHOR JUST TUREND INTO A CAT AND IS BEATING UP A CRITIC!!!" - panicked bystander

"I am sexyyy..." - The Emperor (who forgot to use third person for a moment)

"The Emperor switches from side to side with the frequency of a cheap ham radio" - player (GM?) comment

"Let's put this show on ... PAUSE!" - The Emperor

"Does compassion count if it's toward yourself?" - The Emperor

"I think we just started a war ... between Heaven and us." - Poreus

"You are standing there... a gout of flame is coming at you. And all you can think is... 'AGAIN???'"
- GM to The Emperor as the Emperor withstands the sun's plasma

"You are standing in the burning conflagaration... and your cell phone rings."
- Same as previous

"I have a newly developed form of Tai Chi that should do."
"Does it involve RUNNING AWAY?"
- The Paragon Dragon explains how he will defeat Death & Pestilence, but Barry is skeptical.

"I AM WAR.... I ... am......... fuck!"
War, as he realizes that he is being pulled into a black hole

"You have what?" - Amy
"Fish." - Jon
"What are you talking about?"
"I have fish. Like some people have crabs, I have fish."
"You have fish orbiting your genitals?"
(It's tough being married to a mage.)

"I'm horrible! I'm a psychopath!" - Katya
[pause] "Yes, but you're *my* psychopath." - Elizabeth
Elizabeth accepts her girlfriend Katya's apology for accidentally torturing her to death

"You're not hysterical, and it's freaking us out!"
Katya, explaining to Adrian that his newfound maturity would be welcome, except that the evil god seems to be responsible for it

"It would have worked if I had jumped out of a *higher* window!"
NPC Robert demonstrates a keen lack of understanding of the principles of unpowered flight

"I worry that beneath your calm exterior of repressed British indifference there lurks a smoldering volcano of rampaging derangement which at any moment could explode forth and spread like a fetid fungus through the sweaty body politic of our party." - Katya
[pause] "Where *exactly* did you learn to speak English, again?"
Katya again expresses her concern about Adrian, causing Elizabeth to once more wonder about the history of a non-native speaker who apparently learned "exsanguinate" but not "pencil"

"Doesn't that require a human sacrifice?"
"Well, yeah."
[Pause.]
"Wouldn't that make a bad first impression?"

"On the bright side, both of the characters whose players told me they intended to kill me the next time they went insane are now dead."
The upside of accidentally killing half the party in a moment of panic

"How can I save the world? I couldn't even manage to save one country!" - Katya
"Well, it's a big country." -Xian
"Only a few hundred million people. I should have been able to manage it. I'm tall."
"Maybe you should have started with somplace smaller, like Lichtenstein."
Xian attempts to convince Katya that she does not need to take personal responsibility for Stalin's rise to power in post-Revolutionary Russia

"Um . . . you like guys too, right?"
"Is this really the right moment to discuss this?"
Katya and Elizabeth ponder the effects that a possibly irreversible shape-changing spell will have on their relationship with surpassingly bad timing as they pack a drugged, unconscious, and bound KGB agent into a crate of celery.

"You should do that again when I'm not looking."
Initial efforts to conceal the Dagger of Isis from the Dark God's (possible) minion were unsuccessful

"We need a Shoggoth for this shit." - Xian

"There wasn't anyone in the village - why wasn't there anyone in the village?"
"What's that up ahead?"
"What?"
"Rising out of the water!"
"Oh my God!"
"Pull up! Pull up!"
"I'm trying!"
"Look out!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIEEEE!"
"What's going on back there?"
"Yevgeny's clawing his eyes out!"
"Stop him! For God's sake somebody stop him!"
"How?"
"Hold on!"
"We have to do something! That thing's going to destroy the entire fleet!"
"Do what? The machine guns aren't even bothernig it!"
"What's it doing? LOOK OUT!"
"We've lost an engine!"
"OH GOD HERE IT COMES AGAIN!"
"AAAAAAA!"
"It clipped the wing - I'm losing control! I'm going to try to ditch in the water!"
"Katya!"
"What?"
"I accept! I'll marry you!"
             [Pause.]
"Really? You mean it?"
"Yes! I mean it! Now!"
"Um, OK, um . . . as captain of this vessel, I declare us married!"
"You know, you two, I'm not sure that's entirely -"
"SHUT UP!"
Xian, Yevgeny, Elizabeth, and Katya. Nothing hastens the course of Romance quite like the Spawn of Cthulhu.

"Do you think her mom did it?"
"I doubt it."
"Why?"
"Why would her mom kill her and not tell anybody about it?"
"This is without a doubt the most bizarre conversation I have ever had."
cultural differences

"Um, we kind of set the Second Coming in motion."
"Why is that a bad thing?"
"Have you ever read Revelation?"
why White Magic can be dangerous

"You have to help us! Or there'll be war and devastation and lakes of fire and stuff!"
"So?"
The wrong way to convince the coven to help

"I don't wanna be tainted by evil!"
"Look, it's not so bad - just, um, stay away from werewolves . . . oh, yeah, and Satan might come and tempt you on a nightly basis. Just say no."
The Official Sacrifice whines about the results

"Look, would you ask him to do it?"
"NO!"
"He'd listen to you."
"I am not going to ask him to strip naked on our FIRST DATE!"
Problems at the coven ritual

"Look, I didn't ask to be down here doing black magic on a Friday night, OK?"
The Coven Leader grows impatient

"Oh, Dark Lord and Master, Ruler of the . . . blah, blah, blah, you know what's up, how about it?"
short form ritual

"So, um, what do you want to do?"
"Um, I dunno . . . you want to grab something to eat, maybe?"
"Ah . . ."
"Um, something! Not someone!"
"Oh. OK."
how to date a vampire (very, very carefully)

"Bob?"
"Yeah, mom?"
"The police called about that missing girl. I told them you had left the country."
"Thanks, mom."
family solidarity

"Haven't any of you figured it out? This is all a hallucination! None of this is real!"
"How do you know?"
". . . The little voice inside my head told me."
Rick revealing The Truth to Alan in what is probably the least convincing manner of all time

"Well, would you at least be willing to let something impregnate you?"
Alan, growing frustrated with Rick's continued refusal to give creative problem solving a try

"What're you gonna do with a fist full of death?" (said in a sarcastic voice, like "get real...")